Saturday, October 30, 2010

Restaurant Review - Joe's Crab Shack

Location: Downtown Nashville
Items Ordered: Chicken Tenders

Yes, I ordered chicken at a seafood restaurant. One would expect any good restaurant to be flexible and adapt to a variety of meals, but Joe's only meets me halfway there. The fries I got tasted liek they were cooked along with the lobster, and the size of the plate itself was a little lacking. Overall, I really did enjoy the taste of the chicken. It was fully cooked and generously breaded, but the barbecue sauce cup was not nearly enough for someone who loves to smother their tenders.

The employees were all in costume. I was served by a man dressed up as a character from the movie The Hangover who was brave enough to carry around dishes without killing the baby doll on his belly. He was pretty prompt for the most part and since the restaurant was slow he kept us company without compromising speed.

The place was immaculately clean.

(By the way, if any of you ladies who worked there are reading this... I would love to compliment you and perhaps we could have intense, sweaty sex while you're in costume.)

I give this place a 8/10 and I would definitely go again if parking wasn't such a bitch.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Restaurant Review - Shane's Rib Shack

Location: Hendersonville, TN
Items Ordered: 1 shack Sampler, 20 hot wings.

There are many things in the world that seem impossible -- Good, affordable, quantitative food, and excellent service at the same time. Shane's Rib shack pulls out all the stops in completing the exact opposite. Shane's goes out of their way to make food inedible, and they do that very well.

If you have ever drank water in your lifetime, then you have experienced the broad range of flavors that Shane's provides. From the bone-dry chicken wings, to the microwaved ribs, I feel that biting into the table could have given me more of a kick. There is a bar where one can fill their foam cups with various soda-flavored and tea-flavored water.

One may notice that upon entering, the sadistic fat fuck hired young teenage girls as the wait staff. Granted, they're really good at their job. Too bad they can't hire any plumbers; since the day this mystery meat mess hall was open, the men's restroom had problems with the sinks. Mainly, the sink could double as a toddler's back massager.

I don't want to write about this anymore.


Positive: I like the sauce.
Negative: I was shitting green.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Vidya Review 1 - Amnesia: The Dark Descent

On September 8, a group of Swedish developers known to thrill pumped out their newest work: Amnesia: The Dark Descent. Over the past month and a half, tens of thousands of people have shit their pants in the dark, with many people doing it online with an audience.

Frictional Games were known for their work with Penumbra, which at the time revolutionized horror games (and caused me to pussy out very early in Overture). Their streak continued in Amnesia and the reception was good.

Like in Penumbra, the main character does not get to use weapons to fight enemies. Rather, he must avoid confrontation and hide in the dark. This game introduces a sanity meter, similar to ones in games like Eternal Darkness, which causes hallucinations. However, in Amnesia, sanity plays a part of the game, where for instance one can be revealed when he goes into a panic attack.

The immersion in this game would be wonderful were it not for the loud music. Some parts were hard to be immersed in, due to confusion with aforementioned music. The parts that do suck you in, however, do it very well. ( A player will experience real world anxiety and fright, and be tense throughout the game. The atmosphere and pacing were well timed by the creators, and every nuance is masterfully placed.

The difficulty in this game is non-existent, but this is not a bad thing, as the goal is to be the character. A player may die once or twice but it's easy to start over. The point of the game is the storyline. As you progress the game, you learn macabre stuff and this will pass over into real life in a graceful way.

There is plenty of innovation in this game, where new techniques and new puzzle types were implemented to cause you to want to look over your back. Furthermore, the atmosphere must be mentioned again; this is not a run of the mill "It's only a game" type of feeling, the developers did enough to make you want to run away.

It's unfortunate that it worked very well for some.

Graphics: 8/10
Story: 8/10
Sound: 6/10
Innovation: 8/10

Overall Rating: 8/10

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Guy bales himself.

This is exactly as the title says.

This seems like a new Spongebob theme spin-off would be appropriate.

Oooohhhhh who lives in the hills of Tennessee?
Balebob Nopants!
Prickly and pokey and on LSD?
Balebob Nopants!
If farm accidents are something you wish.
Balebob Nopants!
Then do something that would make you go itch!
Balebob Nopants!

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Imagine not being able to come in contact with water.

Now, imagine this:

When Ashleigh gets wet her body explodes in sore, itchy red lumps that take about two hours to ease.

She has to wash. But showering is a painful experience and she can only do it for a minute at a time.

I remember a while back there was a fuss with the movie "Signs" in which it was revealed that the aliens were weak to water. The outrage came from the fact that the atmosphere consists mainly of water. Well, the aliens didn't melt in the atmosphere. This girl isn't breaking out into a husk of a human. I think that movie should be revisited.

Did I just connect a skin condition to a billion year old movie?

Monday, October 11, 2010

One year ago.

Today, I am 21 and 2 months old. By many standards I am what you would call "one slick motherfucker", but I wasn't always like this. I have been one very insecure, indecisive, bleak guy and I am sure many people have gone through a phase like this. I was what you would call "a few years behind".

However, this phase went into effect exactly 353 days ago. The day started out like normal -- I had gone to drive my father to the hospital where he got himself cut in the stomach by knife weilding madmen we call "surgeons" under suspicion of having a hernia. He didn't have one, and he was hurting like hell in the hospital (not from the surgery, but from the fact that Taylor Swift was on TV... for 5 hours). Fun fact, I got one step closer to manliness when I decided to talk to an actual girl. I hit on one of the nurses with no intent except to shake my nerves and build charisma in social situations. But she was married with kids so bleh.

Even though my dad had his gut cut open, we went to a nice, greasy pizza place that evening. I may even do a review on it if we go again. It's a fairly expensive place but I saw a teen couple there. Spoiled-ass rich kids ;_;. The boy and girl could not have been any older than 15. But I only felt a little ronerier from seeing it. I had to do something. I wanted to be un-ronery.

Gaming was the only solution. That evening, when we got home, I was playing some Counter-Strike just like usual (and I even have that evening on Youtube. Everything was fine except I was talking to a particular female I (until now) had no interest with except to play the vidya (because Tennessee is boring as shit) but she told me she had a date... Um. Shit. Fuck. It's not a psychological reaction to girls who have guys. I grew an immense crush, but being a loser like I was kind of made me overreact. I'm so foolish.

Anyway, after that was done, and after I cried that evening, I met another girl I played Aion with. Let's not go there, I made a fool of myself too. But I had filled my 5-year-old livejournal blog with rants and emotional writings. Let me quote myself:
I never felt this way before. But she wouldn't believe me if I told her.

But she obviously disregards me.

Stop hurting me, please. Please.
Pretty dorky right?

My life is normal now despite my phase. I am happy with what I have now and I am working on improving my future. I'm acquiring currency, as it were so eloquently put. And one year ago being a NERDLOL was a phase where I felt hopeless about myself. I am dragging this on too long.

Even though everything I said in this article is true and comes from the heart, I'd like to let you know there is a hidden message if you read the first letter of each paragraph. Thanks for reading.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Real world trolling

I was reading a somewhat popular website today. The topic of discussion was this:

From the page:
During my sex ed class we had a question box, and a classmate of mine put "when you have a boner and it goes away, where does the bone go?"

I actually giggled out loud at this, but I remember when I was in middle school, lots of students had the audacity to do this.

I saw a video on youtube, also.

Yes! I got it on TRRRRRR

So, what are some examples of trolling you guys have seen?

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Insane Christ Posse

From the Article (If you can call it that):
The carnival is GOD

And may all juggalos find him

We're not sorry if we tricked you.

Apparently this whole time, they were rapping about our Judeo-Christian overlord. You know... guy in the sky. This may explain a lot of what I hunched about in "Miracles". They were indeed talking about the fantastic features of this planet. Unfortunately, if it was performed by someone else, it would have been an ace song.

Just read this fucking article, shit.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Can you dodge a bullet?

From the article:
Lockheed developed a down-range system that measured average crosswind; range to target; spotter scope position; air temperature, pressure, and humidity; and more, according to Military Aerospace. Using all those variables, it calculated the ballistics for a .308 bullet at ranges as far as 3,600 feet.

If my familiarity with guns are correct, don't most scopes have lines to allow one to adjust the aim? Granted, lines can't account for wind speed.

Anyway, aimbots will exist in real life soon. And after that, it will just be robot vs robot.

A fine for singing Philippines national anthem too slow or fast?

Being half filipino, this doesn't concern me as I don't even sing the US anthem. But when someone chooses to pay respect to their country, shouldn't they be free from fear that they'd get fined if they make mistakes.

Bad news for pinoys...

From The Article:
If the Senate passes the bill into law, performers who deviate from the official version could face a fine of more than $2,000 (£1,264).

This basically means when someone does a public performance, they will be fined if they fuck up. Well, I think it's a disgrace to the country to make something like this.

Then again, I am only half pinoy. My mindset may not be in the right place. Good thing this only has to do with the tempo of the song, and (so far) not with the words.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Red robin review

Tonight, I ate dinner at the Red Robin restaurant in Hendersonville, TN. Red Robin is known for hamburgers and spirits. I don't drink alcohol, and I am not a ghost person, so I cannot really evaluate their spirits part. I am familiar with their hamburgers, but I don't really fancy it up.

The items I ordered were Buzzard Wings (As an appetizer) and a Natural Burger (And with my options, I got Whole Grain buns and I ordered a slice of cheddar cheese).

Buzzard Wings
First off, not much to say except they were expensive as shit. But, I must counter with the fact that they were all drumstick pieces. This gets major points in my book. The wings came out rather dry, and tasted a little too salty. Let's see what the... OH GOD

1750 grams of sodium. What the shit? No wonder they tasted a little salty.

I give the wings 7/10 overall. I will not be ordering them again, however.

Natural Burger
It tasted really good. I have no complaints at all.

This nutrition browser on the website is a huge pain in the ass, though.

I give the burger 8/10

To wash it all down, I had many glasses of sweet tea. My waitress (and I don't know if it would be appropriate to name her) did a very very good job overall with the service, but she needs to slow down on those ice cubes.

I have a complaint about the bathroom. It was like a water park.

Overall Experience: 8/10